the mondays.

got up at 7 to work out.

didn’t get through my entire three miles because 1) i accidentally pulled out the emergency cord thing that stops the treadmill and it deleted my workout stats and 2) i was more concerned about getting ANOTHER parking ticket as it headed towards 8 than i was walking the last quarter of a mile.

lesson? BE there at 7, don’t just leave the house at 7.

came home afterwards, ate a poptart, and fell into bed again.

didn’t wake up for LIKE THREE AND A HALF HOURS.

sigh. so much for getting work done, since it’s 1:53 and i’m just now starting, if by starting you mean blogging in frustration instead of actually getting stuff done.

lesson? don’t go back to sleep. alarms don’t work. and getting five hours of sleep doesn’t get it done, apparently.

sigh.

welcome to monday.

UPDATE:

and monday continues…for everyone, it seems.

mom has to have more surgery. apparently those margins we thought were clean weren’t quite so clean after all. more details after tomorrow’s pow-wow with the surgeon, but it looks like, if we can make it happen, friday will be another surgery day.

i grow weary of surgeries. i can’t imagine how mom feels.

plus, this junk is just scary.

plus, i am worried about my car and money because gas is insane and life in general like how the heck am i going to get everything done?  how will i manage when i have to keep getting someone to cover my shifts at work?  i mean, at some point, isn’t my boss going to be like “uhm, you actually have to WORK here”?

i just worry.

lesson?  have more faith.  and invent teleportation.

someone i saw on saturday and hugged has strep.

i cannot explain how worrisome this is to me.

i feel good. i feel fine.  i cannot be sick.

my most fervent prayer is that i will be healthy, because i can be of no use to anyone if i am not.  i guess i’ll be hitting the bed early and the vitamins completely.

lesson? i can stress out about EVERYTHING right now. and i’m scared.  just in general.

i just want to cry.  maybe i will for a little while, just to get it out.

and then i’ll move on, i guess, and try to be as productive as possible so that when friday comes, if i’m on the road at 5 a.m. to go to NC just to turn around and come back on monday, i’ll be ready.

because that’s what we do, right?

(when does it end?   i’m pretty sure the answer to that is when life does.  because life is like this sometimes. and we get through it.  that’s the most comforting thing i can think of right now.)

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One Response to “the mondays.”

  1. 1. Take some Airbourne – it will prevent you getting sick (probably)
    2. Cry . . . and then eat another pop tart 🙂
    3. Don’t worry about all of that “stuff” . . . it’s really just “stuff”
    4. Do you want some $$ to fly to NC?

    It will be ok . . . Wish I could say something more to help. I ❤ you.

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