i get by with a little help from my friends.


so yesterday, i fell apart a little.

after three days of stagnation on the chapter that had been going SO well, i had crippling writer’s block, which is necessarily accompanied by crippling self-doubt, which leads to paralysis in every aspect of my life.

i tell you this not so that you will feel sorry for me–i got myself into it, and i’ll get myself out of it–but to preface what i’m about to introduce and maybe to explain why i ate an entire bag of haribo gummi bears (the only kind worth it) and cried for twenty minutes on the phone with my mom.

humbled, i definitely am.

i describe where i’m at right now in exercise terms–you may or may not get this. you know that point, at the beginning of your workout, where you’ve been going for a little while and then you just want to stop and die?  for me, it’s about 15 minutes.  to get my heart rate going, it requires an inordinate amount of effort.  at 15 minutes, i have to work harder than i do at any other time.  but i’ve been doing this long enough to know that, at 20 minutes, i hit my rhythm. everything settles into place and i can go forever.  well, at least for an hour.

i am at 15 minutes in this dissertation. and i’ve got to put a whole lot of effort into it, at least for the next little while, to get over this hump.  i feel like, at my metaphorical 20 minutes, i’ll have settled into a routine and will have figured out the system.

so…i’m going internet dark for two weeks.  no more fixating on the blog, facebook, and email.

DRBOLTE is going internet dark–but not this blog.

i have lined up a pretty interesting, engaging group of guestbloggers for you, and i am so blessed to have people in my life who will help me keep my blog alive while i go and focus on something else for a little while.  seriously, they all jumped without question into the fray when i asked.

these are the folks the beatles were talking about.

enjoy them.  leave them comments here and, most especially, visit them on their own blogs.  they’re all fabulous.

and i now owe them big.

see you in september, y’all.  big internetz loves.

One Response to “i get by with a little help from my friends.”

  1. absurdbeats Says:

    Dissertating sucks. There’s just no way around it. After years of doing NOTHING on my dissertating, I finally got mad enough to write the damned thing.

    Mad? Yeah. I did everything that was expected of me: find a good topic, learn everything about it, everything in the neighborhood, everything in the city, town, state, and country, and figure out what it means. So I did—and now you sons-of-b**** expect me to WRITE it all out? Like, you don’t trust me when I tell you I learned all of this sh**?

    So I got mad, and I got through. Figured out a schedule which worked for me, stuck a tape in the VCR (yeah, this was a few years ago) so I wouldn’t be distracted by all those terribly exciting shows on t.v., and wrote. And finished, and got past my committee, and got my PhD.

    Do what you gotta. And perhaps don’t be so quiet in your mad-ness.

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