Archive for the i love youtube–so sue me Category

refuge.

Posted in bff, drama drama drama, grrrrr., i love my life, i love youtube--so sue me, superheckyes, the glass is half FULL on January 12, 2009 by drbolte

today was amazing and not-so-amazing at the same time.

i got sucked into the vortex of drama at my right hand and at my left, some of which was directed at the BFF about me.  i expected opposition, i suppose, because there is an age difference.  but i guess i also expected that those opinions would be expressed and then people would leave it alone.

not the case.

ANYWAYS.

i was upset by two rather saddening situations today, both of which had the potential to tear me down.  i act sometimes like i don’t care a lot about what other people think or do, which is true absolutely sometimes, but in some situations it really bothers me.  i was bothered today, i think mainly just because things kept coming at me and i didn’t know what to do about it.

what i didn’t really expect was how having the BFF right there, knowing exactly what to do and when to do it to make me feel like all was right with the world regardless of any metaphorical exploding taking place in that moment, made everything okay immediately.

i’d been thinking about this song lately anyways, but i realized that today it was absolutely exactly how i felt.

and i think it says it best.

Posted in all i want for christmas is..., i love youtube--so sue me, i promise you that you won't care on December 4, 2008 by drbolte

so it’s time for another youtube packed song post.

aren’t you EXCITED?!?

i decided that this was going to be my “songs about december” post.  mainly because i was inspired by chickbug, but also because i am a shameless thieving stealer face.

but you still love me, so we’ll all move on.

here are a few of my favorites:

counting crows. a long december.  it’s angsty, and i’m probably aging myself, but there was a time when this song perfectly perfectly perfectly perfectly described how i felt.  and sometimes, decembers can be long. i think i felt this way last year too.

love this song.  love the plain white t’s.  love the fact that i am just a big fat bandwagon joiner.  oh well. and there IS a reference to holidays in this song, which is why i associate it with december. i promise.

i love ingrid michaelson. i love sara bareilles.  i love christmas songs that aren’t traditional but still hit you where your amazing lives. (and they’re saying “is love alive?” btw, in case you’re not sure.)

thanks to chickbug for introducing me.

(dude, what’s with the angst? good grief. let’s slap some happy in here, shall we?)

yes, it’s donny osmond.  shut up. his is the best version i could find.  i like the song, not him.  shut up.

makes me giggle every. single. time.

there you go.

some songs that remind me of december.

i’m sure i’ll have more.

thank you for indulging me.

back to my chapter now.

soggy, but solid.

Posted in all i want for christmas is..., fall is football, gators, i love my life, i love youtube--so sue me, superheckyes, the glass is half FULL, the joys of living in Florida, wish i may wish i might, you should really worship me on November 30, 2008 by drbolte

“are you there in all that rain? GO GATORS!”–a text message i got in the middle of the second quarter at the FSU/UF game in tallahassee.

“heck to the yes! GO GATORS!”–my reply.

i spent the better part of my saturday completely and thoroughly wet.  if not for the heavy duty plastic poncho that my roommate’s dad thought to send with her, i’d have been soaked to the skin and likely hooked up to IV antibiotics by now.

instead, i wore heavy duty clear plastic, thanked the genetic lottery for the natural curl in my hair, and did the gator chomp with reckless abandon.

and gasped when harvin was injured.

but we won’t talk about that.

and thrilled when tebow got VERY ticked off directly after that play, told us all in the stands to get buck wild, and gator chomped in our general direction.

and then scored.

it was a good weekend.

picture me early on, dressed in my “i bleed orange and blue” t-shirt, jeans, and blue and orange beads, standing in the FSU north endzone stands right next to the band, as we kept scoring IN THE POURING RAIN, and then add this soundtrack:

that’s a pretty solid snapshot.

(don’t talk to me about how i felt at the end, when the wind started blowing and i was freezing and STARVING.TO.DEATH.  but there for a good 45 minutes? i was gene kelly.

which just sound way weirder than it needs to.)

GO GATORS.

(and dear santa, please let harvin’s ankle heal by friday. kthanksbye.)

so when i say, all dramatically, “i’m leaving!” what i really meant is not so much.

Posted in i love youtube--so sue me on November 27, 2008 by drbolte

i’m compromising.

which really means i’m going back on my word.*

darnit all, i guess i’m a blogger born and bred.

which means i need the cathartic outlet of whining in front of an audience instead of just dealing like the rest of the world.  and they say i’m shy.**

but in an effort to actually continue to eliminate the allure of writing pithy posts and thus siphoning off all effort from the dissertation writing (which soon will catapult my november 30K total to…oh…13,000.  which is still a miserable fail, but let’s hope for the early part of december to kill it but how), i believe that i will limit myself to short posts about nonsense.

or youtube videos of songs that struck me as awesomely appropriate for me and my life.

so, here’s the first.  won’t be the last.  or it will.  who knows?  not me.

not me at all.

*i am notorious for this.  ask the BFF about me and texting or emailing.

**no one really says this anymore, but they should. i actually am.  sometimes.

save me from danity kane.

Posted in c25k, i love youtube--so sue me, me, The Single Life on October 9, 2008 by drbolte

it’s my birthday.

i don’t really want to talk a lot about it.  my plan is to spend the day reading ann radcliffe, nursing some SERIOUSLY sore leg muscles, pick up football tickets, and then steal some silver shoes from my roommate, put on a party dress, and cute it up at dinner and ice cream with my roommates.

pictures will certainly be taken.

this is where you come in.  i am in need of a serious “i’m ADORABLE and hott girl” playlist.  i thought of this…but considering that the song came out two years ago and is a little…skank?…it’s not exactly what i had in mind.

so in honor of my birthday (and my blog’s birthday too, which i missed in the midst of my existential gothic chapter dissertation freakout crisis state), delurk and leave me suggestions. i feel like i am going to need lots of “i rock. the end” girl music.

and you all are precisely the ones to provide.

thanks in advance!

in which i think i need to start paying attention to utah football and live blog the second half of UF-UT.

Posted in blogging, fall is football, gators, i love youtube--so sue me on September 20, 2008 by drbolte

ohio state scored four touchdowns against troy.  troy scored a touchdown and a field goal.  OHIO STATE allowed TROY to score on them, and TROY held them to only four touchdowns.  discuss the imminent destruction of the ohio state program or, as ESPN called it, the O-H-N-O.

nc state won.  that, in and of itself, would be big news. but they won, in overtime, against EAST CAROLINA. you know, the giant killer? so, if you kill the giant killer, does that make you a giant giant killer? for at least a week, before they lose to podunk ACC state, i’d like to pretend that ncstate doesn’t suck as bad as they do. kthanks.

more upsets–boise state over oregon. colorado over west virginia.  if i can hope for more upsets, i hope for auburn pulling one out on lsu. i hate lsu. i really, really do.  and i would like for that national champ to go down. and auburn does it to national champs. remember us? last year? yeah.

they do it. i hope they do it again tonight. i may try to watch that game, but we’ll see if i can write a chapter half while i do it.  i’m not superoptimistic, but we’ll see. i’d really like to see that go down.

byu won.  again.  and apparently utah state is something to behold. since WHEN do i need to pay attention to the mountain west?

the world is crazy and i am going to start caring right….now.

all right.  florida versus tennessee. you know it’s the game that i want to talk about. these are my thoughts, sort of as they happened but mainly afterwards because i was doing laundry at the same time:

  • phillip fulmer may very well have a coronary infarction on the field.  i mean, if i was him, my brain would explode.  but i’m just saying…the emts ought to be standing by. like right by. the first time he threw something, i laughed.
  • i think that possibly the volunteers, at least for the first quarter, have some sort of psychological aversion to the endzone. i don’t know how else to explain their behavior.  i mean, other than that they suck.
  • when the volunteers fumbled TWO YARDS from the endzone, i may have laughed again.
  • sometimes, the superman thing with tebow gets old.  because i buy it and then when he makes normal quarterback mistakes, i get angry.  because superman? superman doesn’t make mistakes. that said, in comparison to the fumbling, tackled, inept jonathan crompton who can’t keep track of the clock? he IS superman just by being competent. he’s just really so bad.
  • verne lundquist is a rock god. the other yahoo that was commentating? idiot.  ole miss is not an away game.  hello. AND MIAMI WASN’T THEIR FIRST GAME.  good grief. i know more about gator football than this nimrod.
  • my questions: what does a color commentator do? and why are the women always the sideline reporters? and how can i get that job so that i can ask annoying questions to really angry head coaches?
  • at three minutes before the end of the third quarter, cbs showed streams of tennessee fans leaving the stadium.  i laughed.
  • when tennessee finally scored, i thought that they had fumbled again. because that’s what normally happens, you know. and then…i realized…that they actually didn’t score.  at all.  when a knee is down, a knee is down. and then they did.  yay them.
  • but actually, i really wanted the gators to shut tennessee out.  but i was afraid to say that or type it or otherwise articulate it.  was that wrong of me to hope? probably. that’s why they scored.
  • i feel like i have damaged my karma here already, but i’m just telling you what i saw.
  • “florida eats clock.”  oddest. comment. ever.
  • tebow runs into a photographer on the sidelines.  he stops to see if the photographer was okay.  the idiot commentator says ‘i’m surprised he didn’t stop for a picture. chuckle chuckle chuckle.”  i’m surprised he still has a job.
  • why is it that i feel badly about a losing team?  they should have lost. they were a big mess, all over the field and without much focus at all.  they couldn’t complete. and yet, when they show those pity shots of the losing players on the sidelines, i feel compelled to empathy.
  • maybe that saves my karma

also, as a sidenote, did you know that UF is retiring these commercials? i’m sort of sad.

but these are the replacements, i think.  it doesn’t suck. it is definitely less cheesy.

so…i’ve been called to do something great.  live college blogging is over; dissertation work begins again.

GO GATORS!

snapshots.

Posted in c, i love youtube--so sue me, me, mirror mirror on the wall, Uncategorized on August 11, 2008 by drbolte

i was going to embed a snippet of the movie i just saw. i went online to find pictures of the sassy, adorable, super cheap dresses that i bought. i was going to show you the yummy smelling lotion that i figured that i finally earned and have been wanting for about six or eight months.

i figured i would tell you my day in pictures.

i was going to not tell you the story of how my dressing room experience was infinitely the reverse of the last time i hit the jcpenney 70% off sale, when i was frustrated beyond belief because nothing fit right. i was going to ignore the fact that i almost cried when i put on a black and white dress that was SO cute but waaaay too short but that made me look TINY…and how amazing that felt. i was going to skip over the fact that i took a moment, right then, to really look at myself and realize how far i’d come.

i was going to not talk about the fact that adorable guys in the mall sought out eye contact and smiled at me when i was just walking around minding my own business and how i smiled back, not assuming that they were skeezy or weird but figuring that they just thought i was cute. because i am.

i was going to pass over the story about how today’s workout was dancing around my entire empty house, like an idiot, to the Mamma Mia soundtrack. and how much freaking fun it was.

i stopped looking for pictures to tell you my story because i think the first one fits best. i think this song just expresses my mood perfectly.

this? has been a frickin’ awesome day.

only so many hours in a day.

Posted in i love youtube--so sue me on August 7, 2008 by drbolte

and there’s always 1/20 of one for billy.

still and small is hard to hear.

Posted in Church, etcetera, faith is action, going quietly mad, i love youtube--so sue me, Life, perfect brightness of hope, Uncategorized on May 11, 2008 by drbolte

i realized towards the end of last week that i’m having what amounts to an internal tug of war between my head and my gut, my logic versus my instinct.

now some of you who read me often (hey! thanks! i redheart you!) might think “waaaaiiiit a minute. didn’t you just write about the importance of NOT following your instincts?” let me clarify for you. when i speak of gut/instinct in this context, i’m talking about that little voice, the one that defies logic.

regardless of your spiritual affiliation, i think this is a pretty standard concept–that we all have that gut instinct, whether you call it women’s intuition or fate or whatever, that guides us to do good things. sometimes those are scary things, things that seem impossible to achieve, but they are always things that encourage us to grow and to progress, to become the thing that we are destined to become, to be bigger and better and grader than we can imagine, in our fininite minds, we can be. it’s the Spirit. it’s there, everpresent when i’m doing what i’m supposed to be doing, and it leads me when i let it.

but here’s the thing.

it’s awfully quiet.

i came upon this scripture randomly today during church when i’d already been thinking about this topic for a little while. i think it very clearly explains how the Spirit works. it’s in 1 Kings 19:11-13

11 And he said, Go forth, and stand upon the mount before the Lord. And, behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the Lord; but the Lord was not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; but the Lord was not in the earthquake:

12 And after the earthquake a fire; but the Lord was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice.

13 And it was so, when Elijah heard it, that he wrapped his face in his mantle, and went out, and stood in the entering in of the cave. And, behold, there came a voice unto him, and said, What doest thou here, Elijah?

it was only Elijah’s knowledge about the nature of the Spirit, about the nature of God’s approach, that allowed him to ignore the booming around him and tune into the quietness of the Spirit. i think this is a really important idea. the Spirit is not in the loud logic of our lives–it’s the small voice that guides us, the gentle whisper of an idea that passes by, and then passes by again, until we listen to it, the urge to call a friend out of the blue, the instinct to be kind rather than catty. for me, sometimes these whispers come in illogical answers to what makes sense on paper.

without getting into too much detail, i have a situation right now in my life that seems to make sense on paper in every way. the numbers add up, if you will, even though it’s not a numbers game. at the beginning, i felt good about it. i had no reason really not to, but beyond that, i felt pretty peaceful about it. now, even though i am being encouraged by other people (including my mom!) to give it a shot, and i want to keep an open mind, i can’t deny how much of that quiet voice is warning against it. even as i write and think about it now, i feel it so clearly. but warning’s not the right word. it’s just very clear: this won’t work. pit of my stomach surety. in this case, to call it my gut instinct would be a topographical as well as a metaphorical description.

but it should work. the logical part of me is battling with that feeling, saying: hey. what’s the harm? go for it. to contrast this logic, the most distinct impression comes: wait. just wait.

waiting doesn’t make any logical sense, though. it really doesn’t. and this isn’t the kind of waiting that is accompanied by indecision or fear. in fact, the waiting is scarier than the moving forward. i’ve never really been a standaround kind of girl.

so you see my dilemma. my logical side, the side that looks at the pro/con list and weighs and measures things, is saying to do one thing. my instinct, what i can only assume is the Spirit since it has never wavered, only gotten stronger after prayer, is saying something entirely different. something that doesn’t make any sense of all.

and i just don’t get it. not that i necessarily need to get it–so much of life is about taking one step into the darkness in faith and moving forward with that faith even when you don’t see the grand expanse ahead of you–but how do you explain to other people who don’t understand?

so i stand inbetween, waiting for a sign about which one is right. that in and of itself frustrates me, because i don’t like hanging out in indecision city. or maybe what i should say is that i don’t like doubting my instincts…and i don’t like it. i think some of it will resolve itself soon, but i don’t like it. i wish i could know for sure. but knowledge isn’t faith, right?

so i’ll be over here having faith, and trying to trust that voice in my heart. and telling my head to stifle it.

and in case none of this made any sense whatsoever to you, i’ll bribe you with this, which i have for some reason not been able to get enough of today. i even made part of it my facebook status–and that’s when you know a song really strikes you. it really has nothing whatsoever to do with anything, lest you begin to read my life in the plotline of rent (good heavens, no drama here), but it’s awesome and it’s youtube and i don’t think you need any more than that.

happy sunday, all.

what i am right now.

Posted in blogging, celebrities, etcetera, i love youtube--so sue me, i promise you that you won't care, Life, the internets, TV and me are pals on May 8, 2008 by drbolte

i am, at this moment in time:

–petrified that the GINORMOUS bug that i saw last night and that made me scream like the girl that i am and maybe, i’m not saying for sure but just maybe, jump a little bit won’t have a family member come searching after him because he met his demise between a wad of paper towels and the toilet bowl flushing.

(and if you want to yell at me about killing the bug, stifle it.  i don’t want to hear it.  it being in my world was a declaration of war.  i get to do what i want to do.)

–hopeful that the cleaning product i sprayed all along the windows and floor where said bug once walked will prevent others from wanting to come in.  yeah, i know.  not likely.

–finding it impossible to go to bed before 3 or 4 in the morning or wake up before 11.  sigh.

–wondering what would make someone ask me if i’d ever been engaged before.  i wasn’t particularly worried about answering it, as i’m not ashamed of the answer, but it simultaneously struck me as one of those questions that really crosses a line that i didn’t even really know i had.

–waiting anxiously for news about the fellowship. if you’re tired of hearing about it, imagine how i feel thinking about it.

–wryly amused by the invitation that i got late last night via facebook chat (love it.  i think.  maybe?) from previously mentioned leftist politico friend who wants me to come over and participate in movie marathon fun and frolic.  i chuckle even as i write it.  of course i will go.  regardless of whether or not i am annoyed by being called the reason for the modern wal-mart slave trade, he’s my pal.  we’ll agree to disagree and eat twizzlers while watching movies.  good times.  life is nothing if not funny.

–loving my vacation and already trying to plan the list of 2008 summer festivities, which will probably include learning this:

if i could learn to be as cute as jennifer garner, too, that wouldn’t suck.

–ready for tonight’s lost. i consider myself an intelligent person.  but i don’t understand a single thing going on on that show. it is the ultimate exercise in faith.  i someday believe that it will all come together, so i will endure to the end.  and matthew fox is beautiful, so that makes it less painful.

–unnaturally excited about this weekend’s TV choices. apparently mother’s day means that people sit around and watch tv all day?  whatever. indiana jones is on.  a bunch of stupid girly movies are on on abcfamily.  life is good.

and i have officially reached pathetic.

happy thursday!