Archive for the TV and me are pals Category

in which i learn from jon and kate.

Posted in bff, life lesson number 498, TV and me are pals on May 26, 2009 by drbolte

so, i watched jon and kate plus eight last night, along with much of the tv-watching public.

unless you live under a pop culture rock (like my bff who just doesn’t care, bless him–he balances me out so nicely), you know what’s been going on. heck, if you’ve been to a grocery store in the last month and taken a gaze roundabout you, you’ve seen the magazine covers.

so i watched it.

it was terribly sad.

i was going to talk about the show and the people and the situation but now i just realized that that’s part of the problem, isn’t it?  we should stop talking about them and let them live their lives. i hope, soon, that they will just go back to living their lives, pre-TLC.  i hope that they will find a way to mend their family, if their family should be mended, or find a way to raise their children together.  i think they will.

but as we were watching, the fiance and i got to talking because i was rather perplexed at the difference, for example, between this family and a family like the duggars, who have been in the spotlight FOR YEARS. (you don’t have 18 children without some media attention.) they’ve been on tv for a while now as well.  you just don’t see the same changes. 

the fiance suggested that it was because they had their faith to ground them.

now i don’t mean to say that the gosselins don’t have faith. i actually don’t believe that at all. but the duggars make EVERY decision in their family based on a principle of faith, even down to how they spend their money and what they choose to do on vacation. you can agree or disagree with what those principles are and what they choose to do, but when every decision is based on a bedrock principle, doesn’t it make it a bit easier to not be slammed by every wind of reality television fame?

i think so.

but the principle is the same, i think, for every couple and every family.  making your foundation something substantive allows you to survive the storms.  making every decision consciously allows you to map a course for where you really want to go, so that the likelihood is that you don’t end up far, far away from where you thought your destination was. 

surprisingly, amidst the terrible sadness of that show, i think i learned something about who i want to be.  

and i looked at the bff and said “i’m glad you’re in this for forever.”

and he looked at me and said “i am” with a kind of comfortable certainty that made me sure he is.

brought to you by the letter blech and the number 405,678.

Posted in all i want for christmas is..., etcetera, forward my mail, me, sigh, TV and me are pals, will work for food, wish i may wish i might on October 29, 2008 by drbolte

you didn’t know that blech was a letter?

it is. i just added it to the alphabet of my world because sometimes you don’t have the wherewithal to think of anything else to explain how you feel.  except the new letter blech.  and also, it reminds me of sesame street, which always makes me happy. did you know that maria is doing commercials for cox cable now? telling parents that they can check out a new website so that they can review things like “the omen” to see if they are child appropriate?

(let me just say no, and let us all move on with our lives.)

yeah, i didn’t know either until i spent an entire week pivoting between three places–my bed, my desk where the printer is, and my bathroom.  with periodic trips to the kitchen and post office, this is my life.  so i watch a LOT of TV (and holy sweetness i’ve hit a new low if young and the restless is playing on my TV hold on i have to change it and oh good i love lucy).  and so i am up to date on all of the cable commercials because what else are they going to play in the middle of the day when no one except people with the plague are watching?

not that i have the plague. let me not alarm the masses. i feel like, until about…uhm…three hours ago, i was stuck in neutral in sickland, where i didn’t feel SO bad that i couldn’t do anything but i felt bad enough that i couldn’t do much. so i vacillated between guilt and mehness a lot.

but now we seem to have downshifted into a real cold that real girls get, so i feel less like an imposter and more like i might miss halloween.  which i should be upset about, i suppose, but i sort of don’t care that much.

i was going to be a ladybug, you see. i made antenna and everything. we’ll see. maybe i’ll muster enough energy to dress up to take pictures with my roommates. or maybe i’ll just stay in my pajamas.  i’ll let you guess which one i’m leaning toward right now.

did you know that this is the last week of october?  THE LAST WEEK OF OCTOBER. as in we’re closer to thanksgiving and christmas than we were before and OH MY GOSH where did the time go and it’s GAME ON time.

(some of you will understand what that means.  those of you who understand what it means, please understand that in my current condition, i am not feel so very hopeful about such games.)

but that’s neither here nor there.

i don’t really remember why it is that i thought that i should write, except to tell you that i went to the post office yesterday and mailed something like twelve job applications, and did three more online, and some people will be glad to know that at least five of those were east of the mississippi. and i stepped on the scale and nearly fell off of it again because the number was one i hadn’t seen in my adult life. i stepped back on to see if it was mocking me again (it does that sometimes, teasing me with a low number the first time and then giving me the real, higher number all subsequent times) and it wasn’t. doesn’t make any sense, and i fear that it will slingshot back one i am not laying around all day, but isn’t that counterintuitive and what the heck do i care how about i just say YAHOO!

but the REAL point is that i have so very very very much to do, but feel it a tender mercy that i am not freaking out about it. i just keep plugging away, hoping that my best, right now, is good enough to turn someone’s employment-decision-making head or that, if it’s not, my Heavenly Father will make up the difference.

i have chapters to finish, you know.  i’m behind.  and yet, i can’t really freak out about it, even though i have 405,678 things to do before, like, november.

oh, look. there’s the freaking.  good times.

it’s cold and i’m going back to my blankets.  i’ll bring this here computer with me and try to conjure brilliance. or at least use it for its warmth.

i’ve taken this * thing a bit too far.

Posted in blogging, books are bliss, celebrities, dissertation, etcetera, family, i promise you that you won't care, me, perfect brightness of hope, someday I'll be a real middle class girl, TV and me are pals, will work for food, you should really worship me on September 22, 2008 by drbolte

if you’ve been around at all recently, you know that mondays don’t tend to be good to me.  i don’t know why. i’m veering towards insufficient sleep based on what has become the ritual of sunday naps in the afternoon, which leave me more inclined to watch army wives at 1 a.m. than actually go to sleep.

but yesterday i was quite excited to tackle the day. i’ve made my schedule in my handy dandy blue notebook and although it’s already required modification, it’s okay.

there’s lots to tell you–about minor and major miracles in my life*,  about things that are coming up that both freak me out and excite the HECK out of me so i don’t think about them in too much detail**, about how this week’s madness is the fruit of my procrastination, about how excited i am that the west wing is coming back on bravo and how even though i really have no business adding two more hours of daily TV to my world, i will tape them and be glad of it*** and about how utterly joyful i was to find a marathon on on friday when i got home from work****, about how i had a dream that my birthday went by and i was the one who totally forgot about it and how that was more funny than sad, and about how i miss my family and thought briefly yesterday about finding a time when i could just drive up there and surprise them.  i may still do it.  maybe after the detroit conference.

oh, didn’t i mention that i’m going to the motor city?

yeah.

so, i have all of these things to tell you but no time to tell you them.  but they’re on the back burner, just waiting for dead time at work or frustration with writing or brainfried break time to reveal themselves.

hang with me.

but in the meantime, it’s monday, and i’m trying to make it work.*****

have a wonderful day!

*do you ever have those times when you are completely stressed out about something(s), and you don’t think to pray about them because they seem like problems that you will just solve later and so you don’t want to bother with them now because as much as they are subconsciously really freaking you out, you have bigger fish to fry? and then all of the sudden out of the clear blue sky, problems get solved without any intervention on your part but entirely because Heavenly Father is merciful and kind and loves you and decides to help you out, as any parent would, just because He knows that the problems are there?

yeah. those happened.  two of them.  this weekend. maybe three.  actually three.  i am a blessed girl.

**not limited to but including job search. but mainly…other things.

***i live in way lower middle class land. no tivo for me. i work it old school, with a VCR, a timer, and some seriously recycled tapes.  that’s how i deal with fall TV.  every day has a schedule.  i tape them and watch them when i have time, when i have a break, or on sundays when i don’t work.  we’ll see how long this lasts.

****oh president santos/jimmy smits, i love you. but i love josh more.

*****if kenley doesn’t get kicked off of project runway soon, i will do damage to some inanimate object in frustration. she’s so…annoying!  who saw that coming? i sure didn’t.

the return.

Posted in blogging, TV and me are pals on September 3, 2008 by drbolte

September is the sign of many things. It ushers in a new school year, it signals the end of the summer, and a break in the heat. The leaves take on that pretty orangey red color, and start to make that “crunch” and “crinkle” noise as you walk on them. But for me, the most exciting part of September, is the return of GOOD TV. While I do love my Summer TV (Hi, So You Think You Can Dance!), it’s the Fall lineup that really has my heart.

That’s right folks, I, Ohmygoshi, am here to guest blog about the return of the fall lineup, or as I like to call it, Reasons Not To Do My Homework. There are so many shows I’m excited about. What’s a girl to do? One thing that is lacking in my life is the digital recorder (DVR, I miss you so!), so I’ve decided that I’ll play it by ear from week to week to determine which shows to watch live and which to watch online. I know it looks intense, but stay with me here:

Monday

Gossip Girl – Who doesn’t love to be in the know with S and B? Looks like summer was a hot one for our favorite NYC preppies. Chuck Bass and the gang are back for another season of mischief, fun, and pure seduction, and I couldn’t be more excited.

One Tree Hill – Who did Lucas choose? Was it Lindsey, Peyton, or Brooke? I won’t spoil it for those who have yet to watch Monday’s brand new episode. I’m not going to lie, I was slightly disappointed with the first episode of the season, let’s hope things get better from here.

How I Met Your Mother – Will Mrs. Mosby ever be revealed? Personally, I’m rooting for Stella, but they could bring in someone even more fabulous and I’d be cool with that too. It’s going to be legen – wait for it – dary.

Tuesday

90210 – I was a little young for the full force the first time around, but I caught up eventually, and I did watch the very last few seasons live. I’ll tune in for the first bit or so and we’ll see how it goes from there.

Wipeout – Because I love watching people make fools of themselves voluntarily.

Wednesday

Bones – So much excitement, so little space. I’m still upset about Zach being the Gormogon Killer. But I’ve heard rumors about something finally sparking between Booth and Bones, and that’s enough to cure my sadness. 2 hour season premier TONIGHT, y’all!

Thursday

Ugly Betty – America Ferrera is adorable and I want to be her. The end.

Grey’s Anatomy – Um…need I say more?

Hole In The Wall – This is a play-off of another Japanese game show called Human Tetris. Pretty much, it’s people standing in funny jumpsuits while a wall with a funny shaped cut-out speeds towards them. They then have to position themselves in a way to successfully fit through the hole, or they get pushed off into the pool of water. It’s hilarious.

Sunday

Brothers & Sisters – Who doesn’t love the craziness that sprouts from the crazy Walker family? Justin and Rebecca hit or miss? Big MISS for me…for now at least.

Desperate Housewives – I’m on the fence about this one. I haven’t really watched in awhile, but I’ve been intrigued lately. It’s definitely going to be one I catch online, if at all.

REDSKINS FOOTBALL – AMEN

So yeah, those are my Reasons Not To Do My Homework so far. I’m sure I’ll add in a few more once the shows start going, and new shows start premiering. Productivity has just flown out the window. What are some of your favorites, and what are you excited about?

sytycd, performance week two: my thoughts.

Posted in TV and me are pals on June 18, 2008 by drbolte

DON’T READ THIS IF YOU DON’T WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED OR WHAT I THINK.

in order of appearance:

that king and queen thing?  weird.

tango?  meh.  i guess it was okay.

will is a star. i’m with the judges on that.  i didn’t vote for him, though, because i think he should be partnered with somebody better. and if they are in the bottom three, which they shouldn’t be (because i thought it was actually quite good and fun), he’s home free.  cheerleader girl, though, might be in trouble.

foxtrot was an utter snoozefest.  i don’t like them. i don’t know why.

gev’s love story contemporary dance?  hott.  for reals.  i don’t know what the judges were talking about, because i felt it.  it was one of my two favorites this week.

joshua and katee are my rock gods.  they are just stars at whatever they do. i just…don’t have words.  i didn’t like this week’s as much as last week’s, but it’s the second of my two favorites.  i voted for them multiple times.

disastrous salsa. just horrible.  i could do better and…i don’t know salsa.  and if you’re crying in rehearsal?  suck it up.  please.  could they leave now?  i’m ready.

twitchington…was good.  i didn’t think they were THAT good, but i felt it. and from this girl, that’s pretty good since i know NOTHING.  i voted for them. multiple times.

i thought chris tried to crump, but the funniest part of that whole routine was nigel’s comments.

i watch this show for katee and joshua and now for will.  everybody else is lovely wallpaper.

so you think you can avoid reality tv?

Posted in celebrities, TV and me are pals on June 11, 2008 by drbolte

read this. and understand, please, when i say the following.

I. DON’T. CARE. if they stay, can we stop talking about them?

still, it is annoying to me that they take their millions and spend them in a foreign country. pretty sure those are American dollars. then again, the movie business is global so i guess the globe can have them.

whatever.

so much for reigniting new orleans, huh? whatever. DON’T CARE.

what i do care about? So You Think You Can Dance.

i LOVES it. lawschoolgirl, stop reading right now if you don’t want to know anything.

i LOVED me some twitch. and joshua and katee with the hiphop soldier tribute? LOVES. so much. napoleon and whatsherbucket are brilliant, and they were outstanding dancers.

i’m hooked. line and sinker. goner. i’ll be plopped in front of my couch to see who goes home. here’s hoping it’s the disco duck twins. they were sad and wearing yellow, something i just can’t abide. we’ll see. of course, did i vote? no. silly. that doesn’t happen until it really matters…

also…THANK THE GOOD HEAVENS that lisa didn’t win top chef. i was worried. the end result was good, but i was just glad that crazy demon girl didn’t get it. gosh, i’ve hated her from the beginning. i wish her success and all of that, but really…blech.

and now, realizing that i have written an entire blog post about reality television and/or celebrity news, i have to go read a book or play chess or something.

sigh.

out of office message.

Posted in blogging, etcetera, i'm so much cooler online, The Single Life, TV and me are pals, Uncategorized on May 29, 2008 by drbolte

hi y’all.

i’m over at copper boom today, cluttering up her webspace while she’s making the world safe for democracy one summer camper at a time. let’s all hope, for your sakes, that she finds internet but fast.

follow me over!

superquick updates on one-a and one-b.

one-a: done.  via email, which is the way we communicate.

one-b: letting it go.  if it’s meant to be it will find a way, since we’ve been in each other’s lives for going on three years now. me forcing it feels…like i’m forcing it, for reasons that are ill-advised and that i don’t want to/can’t/won’t talk about here.  i feel at once like it’s about him and it’s NOT about him…but regardless…i’m letting it go.

speaking of letting it go…did i mention that i’m a squatter today?  GO READ MY BRILLIANCE.

goodness.

also…are you WATCHING so you think you can dance?  i wasn’t going to. and then i did. and now i can’t stop. and seriously…what are these people THINKING? and how can i learn to bend like that?

my five favorite numbers.

Posted in TV and me are pals on May 20, 2008 by drbolte

LOOK!

did you catch the part where it says that all of the original cast are expected to guest star?

oh sweet mercy, i’m so excited i did a little seated jig.

because i’m not getting up to dance until the thing debuts.  oh, it’ll probably be complete trash.  i probably will watch the first one and be disgusted.  but look!  there are BLACK PEOPLE on 90210! and rob estes is the dad.

sigh.

that’s how you know when your time has come and gone…when you have fond feelings for the DAD on the show.

sigh.

to tide us all over…

too bad the main character is played by that stupid twit from degrassi the next generation. gosh, i hate her.

oh well.

that english teacher ain’t bad.

newsbreak without the benefit of ritalin.

Posted in blogging, domestic goddess, ghetto life, i am your american idol, i love my life, i'm so much cooler online, roommates, teaching, the internets, the joys of living in Florida, TV and me are pals, Uncategorized on May 14, 2008 by drbolte

i had a ridiculously productive day yesterday. it was nice…odd, but nice. i do believe cleaning my room and transforming my desk from the junk mail pithole of death chaos into an actual work space has–SURPRISE!–made me more apt to sit there and, say, work.

whatever. a place of order encourages ordered thinking? what kind of NONSENSE are you talking, drbolte?

i will cease and desist.

but i thought maybe i’d update you on what i’ve done because i would rather do anything but do yoga, which is what i should be doing but instead i’m here.

shut up.

so…yesterday i BUILT! A! WEBPAGE!

i know. cue the violins, hearts, confetti, and attractive men giving me heaps of money. it is that much of an accomplishment.

(they don’t do that? crap.)

see, the university i work for has a rule that you have to publish your syllabus on the internet for easy access to students. i interpreted this, after the great hard drive implosion of 2006, to mean any way i could get it on an internet site, including webct, would work because i had lost all of my files and could not see a way to replace them without losing my mind.

i actually do not think that’s what they mean, however, so i am trying to make it more accessible and abide the spirit of the law as well as the letter of the law. also, my previous website is just…not okay.

(it’s blue.  enough said.)

but cue frustration, because heaven help me if i can figure out how to ftp the gorgeous thing to my webspace. i did it successfully (ultimately…i have foggy memories of this kind of frustration) on the computer that is no more (sigh. poor drbolte’s first macbook. it had so many pretty pictures and purchased songs and irreplaceable documents on it that i never backed up…yeah.). but now i can’t figure it out.

good thing i can just post it from school without much effort, huh? because, apparently, it requires NO! BRAINS! WHATSOEVER!

yeah, we’ll see.

THEN…after i BUILT! A! WEBPAGE! i wrote my cv.

let me tell you what.  it took me like three hours.  because really, how am i supposed to remember what the name of the presentation that i gave at a graduate conference in 2003 was?  how am i even supposed to remember what the graduate conference was ABOUT?

(you know where all of that information is? poor sad first macbook.  le sigh again.)

(oh.  and that whole thing about keeping up your CV as you go along.  VERY good plan.  i’m onboard.  because dissertation writing = brain suckage and you don’t keep the memories of the things that don’t matter very long.  knowing the biographical details of random d-list stars…important.  knowing what you have or have not accomplished in your life…apparently not so much.  drbolte’s moral of the story: don’t wait seven years to write it.)

thank heavens for google, let me just tell you.  i googled myself.  and came up with some stuff i did. and then i remembered some stuff i won and tracked the official names down via google.   and then i made it all prettiful (i love me some papyrus font.  for reals.) and it looks like maybe i actually do something in daily life instead of sitting around blogging all of the time and whining about doing yoga. and eating cookies.

because i did that too.

inbetween the great four hour CV construction and the FTP HATES ME debacle, i baked some cookies.  don’t be too impressed. they were from a mix, so the extent of my pastry chefing was melting some butter and adding some chocolate chips to make them oatmeal CHOCOLATE CHIP cookies instead of just regular oatmeal.

because regular oatmeal cookies are boring, duh. so maybe you can be a little bit impressed.

because them is good cookies and made the roommates smile (and yell at me for MAKING! THEM! FAT! to which i laugh maniacally and suggest they hide somewhere for the next week because it is SUGARPALOOZA over here!) so it was a success.

i also watched some american idol while i was saving the world multitasking and i just have to digress immediately right now to say this:

i tried not to like you, david archuleta. you look 12 and your dad is a creepy stage dad and i fear you are about to walk in the ballad-loving footsteps of one clay aiken, who now makes me shudder with his complete creepiness and his stylist’s decision to use eye makeup…

…but i redheart you.  you’re a great singer.  i know you tried to take on chris brown and sort of lost, and who the heck chose a dan fogelberg song for you because really you don’t even know anything about that guy and it’s a terrible song anyways (when i was 3 i was telling mom to turn that junk OFF!), but i see potential for you.

you should win!

because david cook taking on steven tyler?  lame.  i don’t know WHAT simon was talking about.

the end.

and then i edited my too-short article that i condensed from my too-long masters thesis and i think it’s infinitely less stupid and much more brilliant now.  and while i did that?

i listened to the jack johnson station on pandora radio.  do you know about pandora radio? i know about it because law school girl is flippin’ amazing and told me about it (i don’t keep up with what the cool kids do, if you didn’t know. i’m always about six and a half minutes behind.).  it’s awesome. you should go there. it’s completely free and easy to use and full of wondrous nuggets of aural amazement.

and in the midst of this i decided that the soundtrack to my summer (yes i do know where that line comes from, thankyouverymuchiloveboyslikegirls) is going to be populated by boys who play guitar–namely jack johnson and kenny chesney, with appearances by ben harper (how did i not know that i am in love with him?) and brad paisley.

what’d you do yesterday? and who’s on your soundtrack to summer?

BECAUSE DID YOU LOOK OUTSIDE?

it’s summer!

(sigh.  yoga time. dangit.)

help me help you help me.

Posted in blogging, celebrities, dissertation, grrrrr., i hate vegetables, i promise you that you won't care, someday I'll be a real middle class girl, the internets, TV and me are pals on May 13, 2008 by drbolte

hey you. facebook new guy who friend requested me apparently because we’re in the same department but who i do not know from adam. yeah, you.

while i’m sure that you think that’s it’s utterly charming to create dummy facebook profiles for the characters of bleak house, accompanied by pictures of the actors who brought them to life in the pbs miniseries, it’s creeping me out. i already don’t like the “people you might know” feature, and now it’s populated by fictional characters.

my life is surreal enough without you screwing with it. cut it out.

also…facebook chat? i think i might love it. but i can’t decide.

how is it that when i set out to condense my 60 page masters thesis into a 20 page essay, two things happened:

a) i realized that my writing was not nearly as assertive as it is now (yay for confidence!)

and

b) IT ULTIMATELY ENDED UP TOO SHORT.

someone explain how that happened. i think it had a little something to do with me being disillusioned with the crap and padding. but whatever. i still should have ended up with more than 17 pages.

grr.

the unholy attraction of the hills and why, after he busted into her meeting, heidi would leave with spencer WITHOUT EVEN CALLING HER BOSS TO TELL HIM OF HER PLAN.

discuss.

i need a fake tan. how? help me look not northern european pasty white but not damage my skin any more than it already is. i’m too old for that idiocy, i’ve decided.

i’m excessively tired of doing dishes.

this revelation just hit me today.

are you tired of a chore that won’t go away? can you make me feel better about my life? dishes, trash (which i have effectively managed to get out of for like eight months now…i have no idea how except that i have amazing roommates), and ripping up stupid credit card offers that come in the mail so that i don’t get my identity stolen are my least. favorite. things. ever. except for maybe the gynecologist. yeah, that one tops them all. but i feel like that’s a given, right girls?

so, yeah…long story short too late…dishes. hate them.

just realized i didn’t pay my car payment today when it was the last day to do it without seeming like a giant bill flake.

super.

updated to say: they told me i have to wait “another week or two” to find out fellowship results. could they just shoot me, pour honey all over me, stick me in the hot burning sun on top of an anthill instead? that would be kinder.

freaking bureaucracy. give me MY MONEY! mine. mine. mine.

i think. i hope. bah.

i’m just profusely sorry about the five-year-old kid nature of this post, the whole “and then, this happened, and then, this happened and then, this happened, and then there was cake!” of it all, but…it’s how i feel. i’m all ADD girl lately.

and now i want some cake.

and if it wasn’t 2:20 a.m., i’d go buy some.

because sometimes, you just need some cake.